Stop and Think
Many of us have come into contact with great pain in our lives. A pain deep down that is far more hurtful than a busted leg and trapped in a memory that continues to play like a broken record. And then panic enters your mind of how to quickly get rid of it all and stop the memory following you like a bad smell. You can get rid of physical pain- that’s what pharmaceuticals are for but emotional pain, how can you treat that?
Yes there are counsellors and psychiatrists all on speed- dial to call up when we need to, but the whole process of therapy takes time and when you’ve got emotional pain- time is a hindrance not a help. When you’re in so much pain, sometimes you wait for a cure- truly understanding why some people feel there’s no other direction but to commit suicide.
This is obviously not the answer to the world’s woes and the minds misery- let alone the pain that spreads to love ones and it’s even more destructive than committing adultery. Stop and think are three little words that go a long way. The most difficult and challenging thing you can do to help cope or work through emotional pain is to pick up that phone and ask for help. There’s nothing wrong in asking for help, don’t ever think it’s a sign of weakness because it isn’t. In fact it’s a sign of strength- the power you have at your control to fight for sanity and even your life.
It’s a massive step, but one definitely in the right direction. It’s amazing how talking to someone you’ve never met can be so liberating and fulfilling at the same time; and you can put down the phone and think “Wow! I managed to ask for help today all by myself and a complete stranger has pointed me in a direction that I thought would be impossible for me to head. So I have my appointment and this is what I need to do next”. You should be proud of yourself and probably relieved to think that some people do still care in this world and that humanity isn’t completely extinct.
The golden rule you need to apply during this time is patience. There’s no quick fix for recovery, whether it’s heartache or a heart attack. It may take weeks, maybe months- along with several appointments or meetings accompanied with several trips in the car or by bus. Each appointment is a step for example. The more they build- up, the scarier it can feel to face but the reward once you get to the top of the steps is far better than you can imagine. A reward that this worth more than the world itself.
One tip that I would recommend from my own experience of emotional pain is – don’t go through it alone. Back in 2005, U2 released a song called ‘Sometimes you can’t make it on your own’. I was 18yrs old and I first heard this song on the way to my Grandfather’s funeral- a man I so dearly loved and think of everyday. Standing at the grave, emotions free-flowing from my eyes and nose- my friend came up and stood next to me. With no words exchanged, she simply held my hand. All words of sympathy and support were all in that hand hold and I’ll never forget that. They say actions speak louder than words- suicide is not an action, it’s a panic. Picking up that phone today and asking for help is an action that could be the best thing you do this year.
By: Emma Higman
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